It's time for me to change.. The day is come. Really hard to do, but I know I surely can! Memang tidak dapat dinafikan that yesterday is my hardest moment yang saya alami. Nobody with me when I'm sad even him , my bestie and friends. Thanks to my aunt because she give me advice and strong spirit to me be a successful person. Semalam pergi jumpa my godmother , but unfortunately she's not at there.. Saya masuk dalam church and berdoa banyak-banyak sama Tuhan untuk minta petunjuk dari-Nya.. Now rasa tenang jiwa.. Today I have deactivate my facebook and I guest it just a while.. I don't know what happened to me after KoQ  activity. This semester I will gonna drop Programming and Discrete Math course because I'm afraid when I don't ready with this course, I will gonna fail and it will effect with my cgpa soon or later. Saya ada terbaca dalam Morpheus website and I was interested bila Dr.Fitri menyiarkan about Exchange Student Programme to Chonnam National University, Korean.. I really keen and saya nak try study di sana as a exchange student! Tapi cgpa must tinggi, kan? Cgpa saya pun 3 above.. Layak ka saya?? Hmm tengoklah macam nanti.. Tapi bila tengok deadline - 30 Nov .. Oo my God, terlepas dah peluang!! Tak apa la.. Next time I will alert and try again :) This sems ni I can feels that I have ''M'' disease . Jarang juga turun kuliah disebabkan lambat bangun.. Then minta tolong kawan sain attendance! Oh dear, I don't want do this again!!! Mel, you should focus your target for this sems and don't be a lazy girl!! 2 weeks more last kami kuliah and then study week.. Yeayy :) But kena study juga because bulan 1 next year will be facing final exam :( Oh No .. War again.. This sems I can feel that time was so fast and sometimes saya pun tak sedar today dah masuk bulan December.. Ok, now saya nak share to you all about my story sepanjang saya tak update post blog saya ni.. 1st is about my interview SPA result, ''Dukacita dimaklumkan anda tidak berjaya dalam temuduga.'' Dah tau kan and don't asks why -.-'' I know Tuhan telah makbulkan doa saya and memang Dia bagi peluang untuk saya study dulu demi saya mencapai cita-cita saya. I don't know apa yang telah Tuhan rencanakan untuk saya and I hope everything will be fine and good for me.. I wanna be independent and that I should be.. Cousin saya pula dalam planning nak sambung Phd level.. Umm a bit of jealous tapi happy juga bila she akan capai ke last steps.. Habis Phd, dapat la pangkat Doctor falsafah :) Saya pula bila lagi?? Hmm akan tiba juga masanya tu, tapi bak kata aunt saya,, lipatgandakan usaha demi kejayaan.. Jangan mudah berputus asa! Iya, I will never give up and saya belajar melalui kegagalan.. Setiap kejayaan yang manusia peroleh mesti melalui kegagalan dulu,kan? 1 lagi news yang baru saya dapat,, Linguistic course.. Carry marks yang saya dapat is 13/25.. A bit of upset, tapi I will try my best to my final assignment (25%).. Hopefully I can scored 20/25 :) I will try my hard for it... Last night ku minta putus with him and memang dia malas mahu dengar semua tu.. Oh God, apa patut saya lakukan?? Saya tak mahu bercouple lagi, tapi dia memang sayangkan saya.. But where is his action to me?? Setakat words saya memang tak percaya sebab all people also can create word untuk sedapkan hati and perasaan kita.. Malas betul saya nak dengar cakap kosong macam tu... Kadang-kadang bila difikirkan balik,, memang love is rubbish lebih-lebih lagi bab bercouple ni.. Really irritating and annoying! Tak semestinya si dia akan jodoh kita kelak kan.. Memang saya cinta and sayangkan dia juga, tapi kenapa I must yang jaga hubungan ini.. How bout him?? Pernah tak dia memahami saya?? Pernah tak dia ada when I really need him just like yesterday?..  I know masing-masing busy, but at least dia mesti da sedikit masa untuk diluangkan dengan orang yang dia sayang.. Lepas ni saya akan macam tiada perasaan sebab saya dah fed-up dengan semua drama ni.. Wish you know my love with you memang takkan berubah, Bless.. I know you love me, I love you too.. Saya terserah pada Tuhan aja.. Biar la saya berusaha menjaga hubungan ini, tapi saya tahu Tuhan yang tentukan.. I hope dia la jodoh saya kelak, Amen :)

p/s : Life is always been like that.. Then, try to be happy and be yourself :)

Labels: Life